Thursday, August 12, 2004

Why Jon Stewart Rocks and Should be Your Boyfriend, Too (wait, no he shouldn't -- he's mine! ALL MINE!)

A couple of posts ago, my good friend Ursus saw fit to comment

Ewwww, gross!

to my declaration of love for my dearest, most special boyfriend Jon Stewart. I feel compelled to defend Jonny boy, if only because that's what a good girlfriend would do.

1. Jon Stewart churns out better news than actual news shows.

Yes, actual news programming gives you the headlines, the human interest, the startlingly groomed anchors. However, the Daily Show provides this and more -- headlines, PLUS commentary on the total INANITY of other station's reporting. The incoherent mess that is a stump speech. The thrill of irrelevance, the agony of a really bad sound bite.

2. Jon Stewart is much, much funnier than actual news anchors.

Well, at least if you're a sucker for cynicism. And literate enough in current events to know what he's making fun of.

3. Jon Stewart is cute.

Contest it if you will, but smart, snarky guys are the hottest. No holds barred.

and, finally,

4. Jewish guys have the biggest schlongs.

This is just an undisputed fact. Sorry, Tim. Irish guys are second.

P.S. Jen's boyfriend Ed Helms is on the show, too. Even better.


Choke, cough Sorry, Dad. That wasn't meant for your eyes.


At 11:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wasn't objecting to Jon Stewart- I was grossed out by the sickly sweet 'love you honey, kiss kiss.'

Hell, I'd almost do Jon Stewart...


At 3:48 PM, Blogger Ontario Emperor said...

In the mid 1990s, Los Angeles radio disk jockeys Kevin and Bean issued their annual Christmas cassette, "How the Juice Stole Christmas." (This was around the time of the O.J. trial.) Jon Stewart contributed a piece to that tape, purposely misunderstanding the word "Juice" and clarifying that he wasn't responsible.

The strength of the Daily Show is in its very talented contributors. I'll grant that Stewart is humorous himself, but when he plays straight with the reporters, the results are wonderful.

However, one of my favorite Daily Shows was the one that aired right after September 11, 2001. It's rare to see Stewart in a serious mood (in this case, nearly in tears), and one of his comments has stuck with me. From his apartment, he used to be able to see the World Trade Center. After 9/11, he obviously couldn't see the WTC any more...but he could see the Statue of Liberty.

But I wouldn't do him...

At 4:03 PM, Blogger Katie said...

Yeah, that was actually awfully moving. I remember watching it at the time as a break from my 24 hour a day CNN marathon.

BUT, I'm glad you wouldn't do him, 'cause like I said, MINE! Hands off, Ursus! :)

At 4:36 PM, Blogger Erinna said...

I'll fight ya for him, Katie... ;)

At 4:42 PM, Blogger Jason said...

I will have to make sure my girlfriend reads this post. She has had an unabated crush on John Stewart for a few years now and her friends all make fun of her for it. It will be good for her to know that there are others out there just like her.


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